[For Claudia]

[fuelforthefire]

Dinner had been amazing, no matter what Claudia had said or how much she had stressed during cooking. I'd teased her, of course, making faces after my first bite before pronouncing it not only edible but delicious. There would likely be some sort of revenge later, but I didn't mind. things felt easy between us most of the time, like this was how they should be. It was a feeling that I was learning to trust, perhaps more slowly than I should have, but I knew Claudia had her own reservations and reasons for holding back.

I'd offered to do the dishes, but she'd insisted that I go sit on the couch with a glass of wine. I'd agreed, but as the minutes ticked past, I wondered what was going on. Was something wrong? "Claudia?" I called out, half-ready to charge into her bedroom and deal with whatever was keeping her, my mind immediately going to intruders or city mischief. "Are you okay?"

Comments

[warehousenextgen]

"Huh?" It takes a minute for my brain to catch up and start thinking again. "Right, I have those. Hold on."

I don't really want to, but I untangle myself from his warm arms and legs to roll over and reach for the side table. Pulling open the drawer, I grab one of the condoms I have stashed there. Because I was thinking at least that far ahead. When I was thinking.

"Here." I pass the packet to him, not really sure I trust myself to do the honors so to speak.

[fuelforthefire]

There was a session as part of Barton U intake, where they'd handed out condoms and told us all about the safe sex clinic. I'd watched people blow them up and make water balloons and a few days later I had found the clinic and asked how they were used. The demonstration had been with a cucumber, and as much as I'm grateful for that, this is entirely different. I wonder if she can see my hands shake, and when it's on I have to let out a nervous laugh, the breath I had held to that point. I pull her close again, shifting my thigh over hers and kissing her. I can feel the way I press against her and it's more tempting than anything I've experienced.

[warehousenextgen]

I figure there's nothing I can say that will make the situation any more or less awkward so I stay silent until I'm in his arms again, close enough to feel my heartbeat and his. "We okay?"

I hope the answer is yes, because I am beyond ready. I want this, I want him, I want us I want... everything. Too much to put into words. I encourage him with everything I have, my lips, my hands, my leg as I hook it up and around him again. But I don't want to push anything. Not that I'm expecting a no any time soon, but still. It's a big step.

[fuelforthefire]

"We are," I say, my voice higher than I'd expected. It makes me smile, knowing that any desire to seem suave has long since passed me by. That's alright, I'd rather seem totally in love with her and involved in the moment, which I am.

Her leg hooks around my hips and I can't resist any longer. I press forward, slow as I push inside of her a bit at a time. I can't help but gasp at the feel of it, at her beneath and around me.

[warehousenextgen]

"Oh, God..." My breath catches because this is unlike anything else. I mean, a girl can do a lot on her own, you know, but this is something else, this is.... connection. Trust. Love I guess, although I get why some people might do this casually. This is just... I have to assume it's better.

I feel pressure and pleasure in equal amounts, feeling him slide into me like... there are no words, not really. Suddenly we're together in a way that I couldn't have even imagined and honestly? I imagined a lot. It takes a few seconds for me to relax into it, but when I do, my hips relax and I bury my head in his shoulder.

[fuelforthefire]

I kiss her temple, her cheek, I catch her hand with mine and press them both into the sheets. It's the way she moves with me that really gets me, that makes something catch deep in my belly and sets my heart racing faster than it already was. This is something we're completely together on and the differences of our past and our lives don't matter any longer.